If you thought you knew how to satisfy men, you are wrong. There are so different and their needs also. Just like you. So, tip no. 1 is:
1. Ask him what he likes.
Even if it is just a one-night stand try to find out what he is in to so you know if you are on the same page. Cause if you are not then you should know if you can compromise so that you can each receive the orgasm you deserve.
2. Praise his skills.
Or try gently to tell him what to change and work on it together. Men feel very self-conscious about the way that their body or penis look and really are affected by this in the bedroom. If a man has a penis to small for your needs try to break up gently – there is some vagina out there suitable for him or if you like him and want to give it a try, find other ways to compensate for it. Either by oral, fingering, dildos, strap-on.
3. Practice on that hand jobs.
And then surprise him in different locations, in the movies, in the car, on an empty street. There is always time and places to play with that hand around hist penis and balls. Don`t be shy, ask him if you see he doesn`t like it at first, what you can change to make it better. Some like it hard, fast, slow, smooth, ball play and many other moves.
4. Don`t get upset.
When you find out he is masturbating or watching porn don`t overact. Actually, if you didn`t do it before, start doing it immediately. You need to discover your body and learn what makes you orgasm. There are so many women that think they are frigid because no man has satisfied them but in fact when they masturbate, they realize that they can have an orgasm and quite easy. You can fuck with 30 man and still cannot achieve an orgasm. Is not you! Is them. Most man learn how to have sex from porn, where women orgasm just by penetration or when they suck dick. But in real life giving a woman an orgasm is not an easy job. So, don`t stop searching for it! And don`t get upset when your partner masturbates or watches porn, it says nothing about your lack of skills. These are 2 different things and incomparable. And if it`s the other way around and he gets mad that you use sex toys or watch porn try to explain to him that this doesn`t harm your relationship and that you should be honest about what makes you cum and not feel threatened.
5. Share your sexual fantasies.
Both women and men have fantasies that they worry their partner will judge them for it. You can take it with babe steps and ask him what is his opinion about let’s say threesome with another man or girl (I bet that he has no problem with the girl) or about swinger clubs or about some fetish. Or try to take it gradually in bed with a finger in his or your ass and then ask about anal play or dress up in latex and see if he likes it rough. Experience with your desires, you may never know what other acts can give you pleasure. And is ok also to say no if you don`t agree with it or don`t feel comfortable. You shouldn`t feel guilty for not accepting his proposal but instead try to meet in the middle where you both can find it pleasant.
6. Tell him what you like.
It is ok to think about your pleasure and you need to tell him where you want to be touched and how, the intensity of it and other instructions. I know you think it can ruin the fun but it doesn`t. Is worse to just lay there and wish it will be over soon, hopefully wishing he guess what is better for you. Give him hints if you are to shy. Move the position, take his hand and put it on your breast or pussy, push his body with your body. Sometimes is hard telling the other person what to do or how to act, because he might take it personally and feel rejected. But your pleasure is also important and he has to realize that your orgasm is as important as his. So, if you are afraid to tell him upfront, find other gentle ways to say it. If not it will lead to resentment and anger towards him, manifested in to conflict, quarrels or other deeper issues that only a therapist will be able to resolve.
7. Use lube.
Don`t feel ashamed that you are not wet enough and that you are dry. Being too proud to use it because you think it reflects badly on you will only make you feel discomfort. If you think he is the reason you are so dry and that he could do something to remediate it then tell him. But don`t have dry sex honey. It will lead to serious complications. If you know you have problems with not getting wet so quickly than is no shame in using lube to enjoy yourselves.
8. Keep the spice alive.
Surprise one another and go on a date night. Dress up! go for a dinner and a walk. Turn off your phones and spend some time together. I know that getting chill in your pajamas while watching Netflix is goals but sometimes you need to wax those legs and pussy (is ok if you don`t also) and make him wear his sexy undies, put on some sexy Savage X Fenty, light some candles and start rubbing those bodies, teasing and denying and play until you`re both craving each other.
9. Use a vibrator during sex.
If you can not achieve orgasm so easy use some help. And even if you do you can amplify it by bringing some sex toys for some play. Is well known that most women have trouble experiencing vaginal orgasms so why hide it. We need that clit rubbed. Believe me you will have multiple orgasms and even is at first, he will be skeptical about it he will enjoy all that moaning and not making all that effort by himself.
10. Sexting and dirty talk.
Stop the notifications on the platform that you use so it doesn`t vibrate and brighten up every time you get a kinky text. Try expressing in text and in easy jokes some of your fantasies. When you are away, send explicit content to turn him on, teasing him and keeping him wanting for more. But be careful with nudes. I know you feel you can trust hum and that it will last forever but just don`t. or use parts of your body that are hard to identify on their own.